Final Fantasy: The Musical!
by Nobody's Song
Summary: Everyone's singing and only Zell seems to notice. What the hell is going on!
1. Seifer Singing!

Author's Notes: Umm….I know something like this must have been done before but you should read it anyways because you love me. All thoughts are italicized.

Disclaimer: I don't anything that SquareSoft does. Namely Final Fantasy. I also do not own "If I Can't Love Her" from the Beauty and the Beast Musical. That is owned by someone other than me.

Chapter One: Seifer Singing!

Zell was confused. So very, very confused. He had been told he should eat less hot dogs but he doubted that was the problem here. He doubted all the hotdogs in the world could make him hallucinate this. Everyone….was singing! As he wandered around Garden phrases and melodies filled his ear, and some people cough cough Quistis cough cough should not be singing.

He continued wandering hoping to spot someone sane among all of this insanity when he saw Seifer leaning against the entrance to the dorms. He looked around desperately for someone else but luck was against him. Seifer was the only person not singing.

"Seifer! Dude, please tell me you know what's going on!" Seifer looked at him a slow sneer, "What are you talking about Chickenwuss?" his voice dripping with condescension.

"I was just wondering if you knew why everyone was singing that's all." At that moment Rinoa chose to walk by and he wanted to cry as an orchestra appeared out of nowhere and Seifer began to sing. Surprisingly he was very talented, and sang harmony to the orchestra. (a/n I actually saw the Beauty and the Beast musical a while ago and the actor playing the Beast did sing harmony to the orchestra which takes an amazing amount of talent to do for you non music people out there. It was amazing!)

"And in my twisted face  
There's not the slightest trace  
Of anything that even hints of kindness  
And from my tortured shape  
No comfort, no escape  
I see, but deep within is utter blindness  
Hopeless  
As my dream dies  
As the time flies  
Love a lost illusion  
Helpless  
Unforgiven  
Cold and driven  
To this sad conclusion  
No beauty could move me  
No goodness improve me  
No power on earth, if I can't love her  
No passion could reach me  
No lesson could teach me  
How I could have love her and made her love me too  
If I can't love her, then who?  
Long ago I should have seen  
All the things I could have been  
Careless and unthinking, I moved onward  
No pain could be deeper  
No life could be cheaper  
No point anymore, if I can't love her  
No spirit could win me  
No hope left within me  
Hope I could have loved her and that she'd set me free  
But it's not to be  
If I can't love her  
Let the world be done with me."

Zell's jaw dropped at the finale of Seifer's song, and was almost tempted to applaud at his talent when Seifer turned around and looked at him, "Remind me again what you wanted Chickenwuss?"

"N...never mind." Zell backed away in awe of Seifer's talent. "I gotta go!" And he turned around tripping on his own feet and running away to hide in his dorm room away from all the singing. _Ahh! This is just too weird!_

Poor little Zell. As if he wasn't confused enough already. Hehe. I promise I'll update soon if people review my story!


	2. True Love

Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy or Bon Jovi and their lyrics.

Chapter Two: True Love

Zell had emerged from his room checking to see once more if the insanity had ended. And he thought it had. As far as he could tell no one was singing at this exact moment. As the day wore on he started to relax. No one had sung yet and he was excited. Maybe he had just been imagining everything yesterday. By afternoon he was in his normal happy mood. He saw Squall and ran over to say hi when he saw Rinoa run up to the commander. He was going to go up and say hi to both of them anyway when he saw the very serious looks on both of their faces and noticed they seemed very upset with each other.

"It's not my fault he follows me around!"

"Well I don't see you telling him to stop either!"

"Maybe you should be less jealous!"

"I'm not jealous! What do I have to be jealous of!"

"You tell me! If this is how it is, I don't want to be with you! We're done!"

"Fine!"

On this final note they both stormed away. Later that night Zell was on his way to his room when he Squall came stumbling in. Zell noticed he looked very drunk. In fact, he was very drunk. Zell was on his way to help his friend, when out of nowhere music started to play. Zell wanted to cry as his commander sat outside of Rinoa's room in the hallway and started singing.

"As I sit in this smokey room

The night about to end

I pass my time with strangers

But this bottle's my only friend

Remember when we used to park

On Butler Street out in the dark

Remember when we lost the keys

And you lost more than that in my backseat

Remember when we used to talk

About busting out-we'd break their hearts

Together-forever

Never say goodbye, never say goodbye

You and me and my old friends

Hoping it would never end

Never say goodbye, never say goodbye

Holdin on-we got to try

Holdin on to never say goodbye

Remember days of skipping school

Racing cars and being cool

With a six pack and a radio

We didn't need no place to go

Remember at the prom that night

You and me we had a fight

But the band they played our favorite song

And I held you in my arms so strong

We danced so close

We danced so slow

And I swore I'd never let you go

Together-forever

Never say goodbye, never say goodbye

You and me and my old friends

Hoping it would never end

Never say goodbye, never say goodbye

Holdin on-we got to try

Holdin on to never say goodbye

I'd guess you'd say we used to talk

About busting out

We'd break their hearts

Together-forever"

As his song ended Squall jumped up and started pounding on Rinoa's door.

"Rinoa! RINOA! Come out here! Or let me in! I'm sorry! I love you! Please forgive me!" Rinoa emerged her hair tousled and her eyes bleary.

"Squall, what the hell are you doing?" Squall grabbed Rinoa in a hug and started babbling about how much he loved Rinoa, and how sorry he was for being jealous, it was totally okay if she wanted Seifer to follow around. "Squall, baby, you're drunk. Come inside we can talk about this tomorrow."

Zell watched as the petite woman dragged Squall into her room. He had dealt with Squall when he was drunk before, and he thought about how deeply Rinoa must be in love with Squall to put up with it. Crazy people, with their singing and their true love. He was going to bed. He needed it.


	3. Damn Cowboy

Disclaimer:I don't own Final Fantasy Eight. How many more times do I have to say it before it sinks in? I also don't own Toby Keith or his songs.

Chapter Three: Damn Cowboys

Zell was practically skipping out of his room on his way to breakfast. It had been almost a week since Squall's late night singing expedition in the hallway, and everything seemed to have returned to normal. He saw Squall emerge from Rinoa's room, dressed in only his black pants and a white T-shirt, his hair twice as tousled as normal, and looking tired, but rather smug with himself at the same time. Zell rolled his eyes to the ceiling. Ever since their fight the commander and Rinoa had literally been all over each other. Zell was happy that they were so happy, but was starting to become sincerely sick of his friend's antics.

He noticed Squall waiting for him and he approached Squall and gave him a jaunty salute as he walked up.

"Morning Squall. Slept well, I take it?" Zell could not resist the jibe at his commander who only smirked at him, the smirk of a cat who had been locked in a room full of fish.

"Fine. And you?"

"Nothing special. You know how it-hey, is that Irvine?" Zell pointed to the main entrance where a very bedraggled cowboy was sauntering into Garden. His demeanor suggested that he had been up to much the same thing as Squall last night. He walked up to his two friends and grinned cheekily at them both.

"Mornin fellas. How's it going?"

"What have you been up to?" Zell asked as he and Squall both eyed up their companion. His clothes were tousled and messy, his hair tangled and barely held into it's customary ponytail, and there were several hickeys visible on his neck.

"Weren't you supposed to be going out with that girl you and I met at the bar last week?" Squall questioned. Zell remembered that Irvine had been the one to take Squall to the bar and get him drunk after his and Rinoa's fight.

"That's who I started out with." Irvine smile was full of pure mischief.

"What happened?" Squall questioned him. Irvine smirked as music broke out in the surrounding air. Zell just gaped as he began to sing.

"I was getting kinda tired

Of her endless chatter

Nothing I could say

Ever seemed to matter

So I took a little drive

Just to clear my head

I saw a flashing neon up ahead

It looked like a place

To find some satisfaction

With a little less talk

And a lot more action

I paid the man at the door

And pushed my way to the bar

Shouted for a drink

Over a screaming guitar

A drunk on a stool

Tried to mess with my head

But I didn't even listen

To a word he said

I knew somewhere

Amid all this distraction

Was a little less talk

And a lot more action

A little less talk

If you please

A lot more loving

Is what I need

Let's get on down

To the main attraction

With a little less talk

And a lot more action

Well she was fighting them off

At a corner table

She had a longneck bottle

She was peeling the label

The look on her face

It was perfectly clear

She said somebody please

Get me out of here

The look she shot me

Through the glass refraction

Said a little less talk

And a lot more action

A little less talk

If you please

A lot more loving

Is what I need

Let's get on down

To the main attraction

With a little less talk

And a lot more action"

Squall shook his head in disbelief at his friend's antics, and Zell just stood gaping at the return of the horrendous singing.

"Whatever. Hey, I'm on my way to breakfast. You two want to come with?" Zell shook his head and nodded in affirmative, and Irvine said he was going to shower and change and then he'd join them. He waved and Zell walked with the commander to the cafeteria, as the two discussed such mundane things as new weapons, and recent political developments in Galbadia. It was though he was the only one who had noticed Irvine's random singing. Damn cowboy.

Hey that's it for this chapter! If you guys have any opinions on who should sing, or any songs you'd like them to sing put them in your review! Sorry about the delay, I've been crazy busy, and just have way too many ideas for this story!


	4. If I Wasn't Mentally Scarred Before

Author's Notes: I know it's been forever but I finally have this story kind of half worked out in my head. Today someone else finally notices the singing which will also become clearer. So thanks for the reviews and ideas. Here we go.

Disclaimer: I still lack any and all shapes of ownership of Final Fantasy. Just thought you should know. And I don't own the amazing Elvis Presley either.

Title: If I Wasn't Mentally Scarred Before…

Zell slid into his room and began stripping of his clothes preparing for a hot shower. After breakfast he and Squall had spent the rest of the day training, even managing to forget to eat lunch. As a result he was tired, sweaty, and hungry.

He jumped into the miracle of heaven invention and began to scrub all the grime away. He was just finishing washing his hair when he heard a pounding from the door to his room.

"Zell! Zell, get out here! I need to talk to you! Oh never mind." And with that he heard the door open and someone-Selphie from the yelling- walk into his room. He scowled and wrapped a towel around his waist, before looking out the door to see Selphie sitting on his bed.

"Selphie, get out for two seconds while I"

"Oh there you are Zell." And she jumped up and pulled the bathroom door which made Zell insanely grateful for his towel. "Aieee! Zell, put some clothes on!"

"I will just get out of my room." Selphie left with her eyes covered and her face colored an obscene shade of red. Zell got dressed and yelled for Selphie to come in, which she did, with her eyes covered.

"Selphie, I'm dressed now."

"Okay. Cid sent me to get you. He wants to talk to us ASAP." The two proceeded to Cid's office and entered to be greeted by the strangest sight. The music began to play from nowhere and Edea and Cid Cid began to dance rather suggestively. Cid began to sing, a little higher then the song was supposed to be, but he pulled it off.

"When we kiss my heart's on fire  
Burning with a strange desire  
And I know, each time I kiss you  
That your heart's on fire too

So, my darling, please surrender  
All your love so warm and tender  
Let me hold you in my arms, dear  
While the moon shines bright above

All the stars will tell the story  
Of our love and all its glory  
Let us take this night of magic  
And make it a night of love

Won't you please surrender to me  
Your lips, your arms, your heart, dear  
Be mine forever  
Be mine tonight"

'What's going on here?" Selphie's voice shook and if she had been a bright shade of red before…

"Wait, you can here that?" Zell grabbed her shoulders and shook her.

"Of course I can, now stop it."

"I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE!" Zell sprang forward and gave Selphie a hug, babbling insanely about the singing.

"Selphie, Zell are you okay?" They both turned to see Cid looking mildly disturbed. Edea was nowhere in sight.

"We're fine sir." Selphie answered for them, coming to attention.

"Good. I have a mission for you two. You need to go to Galbadia and bust up a drug smuggling ring. They are mildly dangerous, but nothing you can't handle." He beamed at their shocked faces.

"Sir, why u"

"Not now Selphie. You two will have to leave immediately. There's a car out side for you. You'll be gone about a week or two, I'd guess. Good luck."

Later that night after Selphie and Zell had left, Squall, Irvine, Seifer, Rinoa, Quistis, and Cid sat around a table plotting.

"I have to say, Puberty Boy, that song last week was genius. Even if we didn't plan it."

"It was playing on the radio on the way home from the bar and I saw Zell out of the corner of my eye…"

"Squally, are you saying you only sang that to be part of the plot."

"No…"

"Listen guys, we only have two weeks to plan. We have the people in Galbadia set up right?"

Everyone nodded in general affirmation.

"Good."

Rinoa stopped glaring at Squall to ask, "Do you think they suspect anything?"

"I hope not…"

"Well, the thing with Cid and Edea was the first time Selphie saw anything. She was on a mission when we had everybody singing the first day."

"I hope this works out."


End file.
